Sunday, December 13, 2009


I thought I was the only one who had some sort of mental issues when it comes to other people using my stuff. In speaking to a few people though, I find I'm not alone. Not at all and not even close. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? Maybe, but keep your hands off my things.

Here's why.

For me there are a few things that send me over the edge and the inner bitch is set free. Those in her path, are quick to be needing all the help they can get once she is on the loose.

My #1 irritant is halters and leads. Each horse has their own. I buy a new one as needed and expect them to be either on the horses stall gate, or nearby, when I go to get them. You never know when an emergency can pop up and horses need to be moved. It's nice knowing there is a halter and lead rope handy that fits each horse in case they also need to be tied over there and kept out of the way.

Which leads to #2. You don't swap out lead ropes. If your horse breaks his, you borrow mine and break it too- there had better be a new one in it's place the next day. Each of our horses has their own lead rope, so I can move them or tie them if I need to.

#3 would be horses that chew on stuff and the owners or handlers who let them. If you know your horse is mouthy, don't leave stuff within their reach. When you do, you know it will get chewed. In the case of leather- show leads, reins, bridles, harness, etc. your safety and others, depends on the equipment being in good shape and Not breaking or failing. It always does the minute you need it the most. Never fails!

#4 would be borrowing brushes, blankets or fly masks. Especially when you have your own, but maybe the horse pulled their mask in the field and you are just too lazy to look for it. Brushes can transmit skin irritants, fungus's or who knows what, but now my horse has a problem, because you grabbed my brushes and helped pass it all around the barn. Thanks! *grumbles*

#5. Using my stuff and not putting it back. I need to use it, but find myself hunting everything down when I could be riding by now... ARGH! Major time waster and the longer I look, the angrier I get.

#6 supplements for MY horse. I bought it because s/he needs it. Why in the world is the whole barn is getting a handful or a scoop in their feeders. Does your horse need it? If so buy your own. Did you think I wouldn't figure out why a 50 or 80 pound bag only lasts a week, when s/he is supposed to be fed a scoop a day and only at night? And the bale of grass I bought for my pony is not there for free choice feeding to whichever horse happens to colic on the day ending in Y. It never gets replaced... *sigh*

I had one barn owner tell me one day, she would be taking MY trailer to the sale to haul horses home in. Didn't ask me, oh no, she told me. Um, No you're @#%$&+&%^$# NOT!!! I had just bought it for a cheap price, there was a partially rotted floor board and it needed some other minor wiring work. The real kicker in this? She had her own trailer- a 6 horse stock trailer. And I was leaving that afternoon for a vacation! So what do I do? I pulled the floorboard out and took home the license plate. Chocked the tires, locked the hitch and made sure the trailer would not be moved. Period. End of story.

I had a neighbor girl ask to borrow my saddle once. She wanted it to use on her horse who was uncontrollable at times. I didn't know where she lived- just down the street somewhere. She wanted to use it to 'work him lightly in it' and the horse was for sale for less than the saddle is worth. Yeah, let me grab the keys open the tack room and take what you want. I'll get right on that. Sure. So if I had let her use it and the saddle had been damaged- who's paying to replace it?

The underlying issue in all of this though, is... Who gets stuck with footing the bill to replace brushes that walk off, broken or missing lead ropes, chewed up bridles, grain siphoned into the black hole and trailers involved in an accident? ME! Don't these people think that if I could afford to buy a really nice _______ I would? And because I did, does that give them the right to use it at will? NOT A CHANCE. Buy your own. Don't have the money? Maybe you should have thought about that before and saved up.

Just so nobody thinks I am a half crazed loon who counts each bristle in the brush- I have been known to let people use or borrow my stuff. I have brushes and things that may be considered extras and if they walk off- well it's not a big deal. But when they do, when somebody else needs it, I don't have anything to loan them. So instead, I will just send them looking for you.


  1. It is only fitting that I should be first.
    I will be back when I have regained control of myself and can post on this subject in a reasonable

    And CnJ, they went visiting again this morning.
    Tolld you.
    Apparently there is a short in the fencing that leaves the whole back free from zap.
    Want pictures of when that changes?

  2. I am pretty open about lending stuff ,as long as it comes back in the same shape it leaves in , and as long as the person ASKS,not tells or just takes.Though there are a few things that are absolutley HANDS OFFF ,my custom sadddle, for 1

  3. I'm one of those who doesn't loan out my horse gear,my horse trailer or my feed.

    I do go above and beyond to help people out. I just get leery of someone who is constantly asking for things, these people are easy to spot, there is a SUCKING sound that follows them..

  4. Fern- I was always taught if you borrowed it, you return it in the same or better shape then it was in when you laid your hands on it. If you break it, you replace it with an equal or maybe a little better quality item.

    Doing either one always sorta guarantees the favor to be granted again the next time around. But as you said, there are some things that are off limits. Other things- you know better than to even ask! Those are things that cannot be so easily replaced. That is not only acceptable, but completely understandable. At least from here.

  5. yes, I am burned out with people at the moment. I have a neighbor who has pushed me to my limits. I have even gone as far as to set up places for their horses go. Where the horses can get the care they need.

    This same neighbor has offered to sell me their rack of bones grade horse for 3000.00 dollars!

  6. WC- *waves* good to see you posting here.

    We try to help people out too, but like you say, some don't know where to stop and borrowing soon becomes just taking.

  7. just in to warm up for a bit , freakin water in the barn froze up. which means everyfuckin thing is froze(including me!)Damn I love this life!!!!!!-32c IN THE SUN!!!!

  8. And the biggest one not try to borrow my horse. Especially if you're a yahoo that has told me to my face that I just baby them too much. So you can go hunting or give jumping or riding lessons. And don't ask for a trial period with a horse that you just got on and whipped up into a panicked run because you love to go fast. I'm not selling you the horse anyway. I'm just touchy that way!

    I will loan a horse to someone I know, and to someone who has proved that they care enough to do it my way. I had a pony that 3 different pony club kids rode, but they respected him and helped care for him.

    I don't mind loaning stuff, but the real definition of someone who just grabs what they... THEY ARE THIEVES.

  9. A friend was asked by her neighbor if she could borrow her brand new lungeline. She let her borrow it, expecting it right back. When she didn't return it after a week, she went to her house to get it back. what she found was her lungeline attached to a MUSTANG who was loose in a round pen, dragging her new line thru the mud 24/7. The neighbor had bought a Mustang and the people told her to keep a long rope on it until they got it tamed down. Since she didn't have a line, she borrowed one from my friend. When the neighbor offered to give her the dirty line back, she told her to keep it. And, they are probably one of the richest people in her town.

  10. Kestrel- When our clients went to the show over on the other side of town, with our horse they were 'leasing', I drove the trailer, and camped in the truck in front of the barn and her stall.

    Care to guess how many 'neighbors' I had that weekend?

    The horse next to her- they dropped her off, unhooked the trailer and drove halfway across town to stay at their friends place... I offered to feed her in the morning since they didn't show up again until long after everyone else had eaten, been groomed and was headed to the ring to show. They declined since they would be going home that day. The horse was lucky to get half a flake down before their classes started.

    PK- that would seriously tick me off. WTH?

  11. this is a HUGE peeve of mine also.
    I could go on and on. I understand your frustration as I lived it daily at my old boarding barn.
    People are just so rude and " horse ladies" are the effing worst at borrowing stuff and not returning it.

  12. It's the entitlement factor, too, so rampant in some odd peoples.

    Everything you value? Hide, or lock up.
    Or take it home with you.

    Halters not left on stall doors??
    I hate that.
    Leadshanks not left at the paddock.
    same thing.

  13. Kestrel:This is from my Post earlier..I'm in Houston TX and am working on getting pictures and video of him...I'll be honest..if it's a good home I'm willing to help with shipping!

    Sorry for the Hijack ladies..

  14. On Saturday I found my brand new lead on the ground, chewed to hell and on a halter I didn't recognize. When I asked the groom she goes "oh that's Buddy's" Umm..NO THAT'S MINE! Um..oh..well..I said "look I lent it to Trainer for one of MY friends horses. WHY is it 1) chewed up 2) on another horse and 3) thrown on the ground?

    Needless to say..groom talks to Buddy's owner and says..hey that's not yours and you need to put it back on correct horse

  15. I can't take 2 more hours of this bull!! AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    I need to win the Lottery!

  16. I just got back from the barn, and my new 30-gallon water container (that I had not put out yet because I was not sure if I was going to use it for food or water), had been appropriated by someone for their horse's use as an extra water bucket.

    OK... Until tomorrow, because now I know what I plan to use it for (hay, because I don't like them eating off the pine pellet bedding in their run-in).

    It was there for all of two days!

  17. I guess I'm brave for posting here but what the family is notorious for borrowing and not returning! My great grandfather used to say "Well, if I went to all that trouble to find it and borrow it, why in hell would I take it back?" And then laugh manically. One time he went to a boat shop and was questioning the ability of a newfangled outboard motor to be any good. The store owner told him to take it out and try it out. So he took it, came back 2 years later with the dirty, rusty motor in hand, and said "I told you this was no good - the damn thing don't work!"
    When my husband and I are were building our house (old barn converted into house), we found an old wagon rotting alongside the barn which we unearthed and then I actually took the remnants and put it in my yard (looks quite cute). One of our neighbors drove by a few weeks later - "Hey, that was my granddad's squash wagon! He always did say your damn great-grandfather borrowed it and never brought it back!" So, I volunteered to take it back, of course, but it would have been in several pieces!
    I've tried hard to "leave behind" my roots, in this case, at least. And I think I've definitely made great strides in not being nearly as bad as my forefathers. But I do find the family tendency comes out in some small items - every one that knows me knows I cannot be trusted with pens or scissors. And the more feathers, and flowers, and names and "do not touch and this means YOU Prairie Farmer" written in big bold ink - the more likely I'm just going to be secretly obsessed to take it. Not that I hide them. I'll leave them on my desk in plain site. I just can't resist the allure of misbegotten pen/scissors. It's like a disease.
    Hi. My name is PrairieFarmer and I am a closet klepto. Phew. That feels good.
    I am proud, however, that I WOULD NEVER EVER EVER think to borrow somebody's horse tack or, really, anything horsey related. (Taking feed seems a particular low!). Mostly because you people scare me.

  18. I don't even have a clue how much of my stuff has walked away. It starts to build now and then. Especially when I start looking for something I need and it's gone.

    I'm missing bits. Lunge lines, lunge whips, dressage whips, bridles, pads, spurs, blankets, brushes, saddle blankets and pads, hoofpicks (couldn't find a freaken hoofpick the other day jeezo people), brushes, squeegee, mtg, showsheen, shampoo. I think my stuff gets treated as community property. I'm pretty generous with my stuff, but dang if you use it, bring it back. If you break it replace it. If you use it up, get more. OH...and put it back where it freaken was.

  19. I HATE...when half bottle of my mane & tail detangler is gone, when someone uses my hoof oil and doesn't even bother to screw the lid back on properly or when I want to reward my horse for a job well done and there is 1 horse cookie LEFT in my cookie jar! arrghhh

  20. Before there was CNJ, I was boarding my beloved Johnie mare as a two year old at a local shithole. It wasn't really a shit hole until I broke up with the psycho that owned it. Anyway, I had only had Johnie for a few months and I only had 60 rides on her. I had to go out of town and the gal that owned the place( invade you had not figured it out, I was dating her at the time) decided to take her on a all dY ride into the desert. And did!

    Needless to say, I dumped the gal and called her many colorful names and showed her my prowess at sign language and promptly moved my beloved Johnie mare!

    The I met CNJ and the rest is history.

  21. Okay, now that I have had some time to digest.
    BTW PF you crack me up and I would have loved to have had the opportunity to meet your Grandfather.
    Hey WC good to see you.
    Anyhoo back to the bitch subject that drives me insane.

    I have a lock on my tack room. Not really to deter thieves.
    More to keep my own family away from my stuff.
    My driving reins are not to play Tarzan in the woods.
    My white cotton leads with the brass snaps are not to tie anything with.
    My tools are my tools period. And if, I find my stuff somewhere I did not leave it?
    Did I mention, I am a little OCD?

    I do not loan out tack. Guaranteed to not end well. Use is use.
    I will give something before I loan it.

    I will almost always lend a helping hand. But my tack is off limits.

    And that is something I do not understand.
    If, it is not mine, I am not touching it.
    Amazing how many people have not learned that basic lesson of respect for the property of others.
    (I am not referring to you PF you have a

  22. And books. I have a pretty good library, and I USED to make the mistake of loaning books out. Not any more. Some of my old favorites are almost irreplaceable, so you have to leave them at my house. Fair warning GL, Sally Swift books have legs...I'm on my 4th copy.

  23. I, too, no longer loan books. In fact, I don't really loan anything. If I give something to someone who "borrows" it, I think of it as a gift. That has two effects. One, I don't loan anything I really want back; two, it's a pleasant surprise if I do get it back!

    If and when I board a horse, unless they have separate lockers for each boarder, I plan on keeping everything but a halter & lead here at home. And if someone asks me if I'm paranoid about getting my stuff stolen, I'll happily answer, "yes!"

  24. Kestrel: EM me at about that horse if you are interested..

  25. Oh, I hadn't thought about books. My Merck manual even disappeared to lending. I don't want to think about how many books are now in somebody elses library now.

  26. I laughed a little when I saw the leadrope/halter comment. That is a HUGE peeve of mine as well. I don't even like it if lead ropes are switched around between my 5, drives me bonkers. Each horse has its own lead and halter for a REASON.

    I do own a chewer too, and anything within range is regularly treated with McNasty. I also make sure he can't reach anyone else's gear. He's sandwiched between two of my other horses in the stall row.

    Now when it comes to tack, I have gotten pretty battle-axe. ALL of our tack has tags now (found a cheap pet tag maker) and I mark brushes as well. This doesn't stop borrowing, but makes things easier to reclaim. I have saved up and shopped around to have the things I do, and I really don't want someone else damaging them!

  27. I went and drew big SHAMROCKS on all my grooming stuff. My maiden name is Irish. Everyone was like.."why are there shamrocks on everything?"
    I looked 'em straight in the eye and said..."it ain't on any of your shit just MINE".

    Problem solved..and believe it or not I HATE being the big of a bitch but the lady whose horse ate my lead rope aint buying me a new one any time soon.

    And she makes more money in a week then I do in a year!

  28. Back in the day, when I had my first horse and was boarding... I kept everything at home, just because.

    A new boarder came in. Everything..... Had her name on it. Buckets, grain bins, brushes, fly masks, blankets, halter, saddle pads, grooming products- you name it, it was labled.

    Nobody could figure out why, since most people either kept everything at home or had a private, locked, shed.

    We soon found out she had come from another barn where everything had legs of it's own. But even after being there for some time- even her new stuff was boldly and clearly marked. Even the stuff she took home.

  29. since we are bitching about hands off..I was LMAO last night. I was in the water closet last night, you know catching up on my reading. All of a sudden a red sock comes around the corner. I thought we had a ghost. dog had gone in the laundry basket and gotten my red fluffy sock out and was bringing it to me.

    He's IN LOVE with this sock (not the pair..just the one) it's the 2nd time he's done this. He just walks around with it in his mouth.

    I had to give him the stern "MINE". Of course it didn't work..another man that doesn't listen to me.

  30. UGH I hate it when people use my stuff without asking!!!!!!

    ANY of my stuff - I keep my set of rainbow ultra fine Sharpies stashed in a drawer.

    The barn I'm at now is a little different. The BO has a big bucket of misc. grooming tools by the crossties that all are welcome to use. That's nice, except I'm weird about skin stuff....

    All my old showclothes disappeared after I loaned them to people, who loaned them to people, who loaned them......

    Horse people are notoriously flaky.

  31. HUGE pet peeve, especially the halters! The last place I boarded, the horses were hand turned out every day. My horse has two halters on his door, and yet I would show up and both would be gone and on other horses' stall door. Not to mention being used by a horse that was notorious for breaking halters! When I asked th BO about it, he said, why does it matter? Because its MY halter I dont want it broken on someone else's horse!! Are YOU going to pay for it because YOU put it on another horse? NO!

    I dont mind lending things out either, it depends on the item, but I want it returned promptly in good condition, and if it isnt youre expected to reimburse me for its value or go out and buy a new one since now I dont have one.