Trudging on

The idea of shutting the blogs down, didn't just strike me out of the blue. It has sort of been a long time in the making. I have posted about things I'm working on with the horses and things we needed to work on, things we've accomplished and things I've wondered about. Some of the posts, I wasn't too sure about technique since I hadn't ever done it before, but in doing my research, found ways to accomplish whatever it was and learned "How To" in the process. WIN!

If anyone reads into some of the things I have posted, there have been some major changes in my life over the past 2.5 years. My marriage is over, it was a sham from the start. The kids and I moved out, horses were shipped off to new homes and life is still going on. It's just heading in a new and different direction. Are things settled? Not quite, not yet. Will they be soon? Time and the courts will tell...

For some of the things I've been thru, there were times I couldn't tell anyone about what was going on. In light of this, I withdrew from a lot of people, places and tried not to withdraw from life itself. It was hard. I knew there would be means to the end, I just had no idea when it would come. There were many times, too many tears to count, a lot of sleepless nights followed by throwing up in the morning. But I had to be strong to get thru this. I am strong. All of this was only making me stronger in some ways, while teaching me to embrace what I may have once thought were my weaknesses. It's all come full circle.

I have changed. I have learned things about myself and others. I have learned what is important to me and what I can let go of. The things I have lost or let go of, are simply that. Just things. For now the kids and I are all ok. The twins recently turned 7 and my daughter will be 22 this month and we are close, though not as close as we were in the past. Some things are collateral damage. Some of that I can live with. The rest? I will adapt.